I keep a folder on Apple Notes called “Cursed Websites.” This morning I added Dan’s UGC.com, where you can buy prerecorded reaction videos for $3 a piece. Browse 2,000 clips sorted by emotion, pick a face, download a 5 to 10 second clip of a stranger performing surprise at nothing in particular, and splice it into your TikTok ad. Custom orders run $8. The tagline reads “100% real humans, zero AI.”
That tagline tells you almost everything you need to know about where we are. The pitch for selling manufactured authenticity at scale is that at least the people in the factory are still biological organisms. That’s the floor. That’s what passes for premium.
Open TikTok right now and try to find a video that isn’t selling you something. A political identity, a digital product, a lifestyle, a personal brand. The girl doing a Get Ready With Me has an affiliate link in her bio. The therapist explaining attachment styles is building a course. The couple doing a van life vlog is negotiating a brand deal in the DMs. There is always a funnel, always a CTA.
Baudrillard mapped the process in four stages: the image reflects reality, then masks reality, then masks the absence of reality, and finally has no relation to reality whatsoever. A $3 reaction video spliced into a TikTok ad is operating at that fourth stage. The reaction doesn’t reference a real reaction. There was never a real reaction. The whole thing is a sign pointing at nothing.
AI slop and human slop have now converged to the point where “real humans” is a selling point like “cage free” stamped on a carton of eggs. AI content isn’t poisoning the well. It’s drawing from a well we already puked in years ago.
